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Doctor, Doctor When I press with my finger here... it hurts, and here... it hurts, and here... and here... What do you think is wrong with me?
You have a broken finger!
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Doctor Doctor I feel like biscuits!
What, you mean those square ones?
Yes!
The ones you put butter on?
Yes!
Oh, You're Crackers!
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Doctor, Doctor My little boy has just swallowed a roll of film!
Hmmmm. Let's hope nothing develops.
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Doctor, Doctor I feel like a pair of curtains
Well pull yourself together then
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Doctor, Doctor I snore so loud I keep myself awake
Sleep in another room then!
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Doctor, doctor my baby's swallowed a bullet
Well don't point him at anyone until I get there!
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Doctor, Doctor I've just swallowed a pen
Well sit down and write your name!
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Doctor, Doctor I'm becoming invisible.
Yes I can see you're not all there!
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Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I\'m a frog
What\'s wrong with that
I think I\'m going to croak
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Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I\'m a vampire.
Necks please!
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Doctor how can I cure my sleep walking?
Sprinkle tin-tacks on your bedroom floor!
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Doctor, Doctor my sister thinks she is a lift!
Well tell her to come in
I can't she doesn't stop at this floor!
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Doctor: You seem to be in excellent health. Your pulse is as regular as clockwork.
Patient: That's because you've got your hand on my watch!
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Doctor, Doctor I've had tummy ache since I ate three crabs yesterday.
Did they smell bad when you took them out of their shells?
What do you mean "took them out of their shells!"
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Doctor, Doctor, everyone keeps ignoring me.
Next please!
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Doctor, Doctor, some days I feel like a tee-pee and other days I feel like a wig-wam.
You're too tents.
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Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I\'m a dog.
Sit on the couch and we will talk about it.
But I\'m not allowed up on the couch!
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Doctor, Doctor I've a split personality
Well, you'd better both sit down then!
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Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I\'m a nit
Will you get out of my hair!
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Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a caterpillar
Don't worry you'll soon change!
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