Love Making Tips - One Line Jokes
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Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity.

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Marriage still confers one very special privilege - only a married person can get divorced.

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Marriage: A ceremony in which rings are put on the finger of the lady and around the hands and feet of the man.

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Marriage: the only sport in which the trapped animal has to buy the license.

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Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth.
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Marry not a tennis player. For love means nothing to them.

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May you be too good for the world and not good enough for your wife.
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May you grow so rich your widow's second husband never has to worry about a living, God forbid.

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May you live happily ever after with a poor, ugly, shrewish wife.
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May you never leave your marriage alive.

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May your wife be a witch who takes after her mother, and may you all live together in a one-room house.

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Men have a much better time of it than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.
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My darling wife was always glum. I drowned her in a cask of rum, And so made sure that she would stay, In better spirits night and day.

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My opinions are my wife's, and she says I'm lucky to have them.

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My other wife is beautiful.

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My wife doesn't care what I do away from home, as long as I don't enjoy it.

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My wife has a split personality, and I hate both of them.

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My wife ran off with my best friend last week. I miss him!

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My wife says if I go fishing one more time she's going to leave me. Gosh, I'm going to miss her.

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My wife submits and I obey; she always lets me have her way.

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