Love Making Tips - One Line Jokes
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Never be unfaithful to a lover, except with your wife.
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No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman.
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I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.

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Nuns: Women who marry God. If they divorce Him, do they get half the universe?

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Perfection is what American women expect to find in their husbands, but English women only hope to find in their butlers.
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Republican boys date Democratic girls. They plan to marry Republican girls, but feel they\'re entitled to a little fun first.

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Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

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Shotgun wedding: a case of wife or death.

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Spinster: A bachelor's wife.

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Suicide is belated acquiescence in the opinion of one's wife's relatives.

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Question: Ted Kennedy: "Where was George?"
Answer: Dry, sober, and at home with his wife

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The days just before marriage are like a snappy introduction to a tedious book.

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To heck with marrying a girl who makes biscuits like her mother--I want to marry one who makes dough like her father.

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The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free.

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The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open.
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The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is Marxism.
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The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman
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The only one of your children who does not grow up and move away is your husband.
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The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one.

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There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.
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