Love Making Tips - One Line Jokes
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Jokes


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"I had a lot of pimples too. One day I fell asleep in a library. I woke up and a blind man was reading my face."
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"My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday"
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"It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips..yet she won't drink from my glass!"

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"Last week my tie caught on fire. Some guy tried to put it out with an ax!"

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"I met the surgeon general. He offered me a cigarette!"
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"A travel agent offered me a 21 day special. He told me I would fly from New York to London. Then from Tokyo back to New York. I asked him...how am I supposed to get from London to Tokyo? He told me . . . that is why we give you 21 days.
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"Another travel agent told me I could spend 7 nights in Hawaii...No days..just nights."
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"My problem is that I appeal to everyone that can do me absolutely no good."
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"My wife isn't very bright. The other day she was at the store and just as she was heading for our car, someone stole it! I said...did you see the guy that did it? She said ... No, but I got the license plate."

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"A girl phoned me and said...Come on over there's nobody home. I went over... Nobody was home!"
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"I went to a massage parlor. It was self service."
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"I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said... Are you going to hate yourself in the morning? She said.. No..I hate myself now."

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"I had a girlfriend that was so fat her belly button made an echo."
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\"I had a girlfriend that was so fat she had her own postal code.\"
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\"I had a girlfriend that was so fat she had a dress with a sign on the back saying...Caution Wide Load.\"
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"My girlfriend was so fat her clothes were made by Omar the tent maker"
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"One day I ran into my girlfriend with my car. She asked me why I didn't ride around her. I told her that I didn't think I had enough gas"

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\"I had a girlfriend that was so fat her bikini was made out of two bed sheets.\"

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"I knew a girl that was so ugly that... her mother ripped in two when she had her."

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\"I knew a girl that was so ugly that... She uses a septic tank for a toilet.\"

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