Love Making Tips - One Line Jokes
Miscellaneous Business Marriage You might be a redneck if...  

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You're moved to tears every time you hear Dolly Parton singing "I Will Always Love You".

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You grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item.

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Your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center. (Clinton true-life story)

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The most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection (your insurance man is a redneck too if he pays you for it).

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You have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

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You've ever hit a deer with your car...deliberately.

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You can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub.

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Your momma gives you tips on how to sneak booze into sporting events.

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Exxon and Conoco have offered you royalties for your hair.

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Your dad is also your favorite uncle.

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Your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.

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During your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.

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You're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light.

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On your first date you had to ask your Dad to borrow the keys to the tractor.

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Your parakeet knows the phrase "Open up, Police!"

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You saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting.

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In tough situations you ask yourself, "What would Curly do?"
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Taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.

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You think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are "Play Ball..."

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You have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.

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