Jokes
|
info
|
|
I hope if dogs ever take over the world, and they choose a king, I hope they don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
It takes a big man to cry, but it takes an even bigger man to laugh at that man.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
I'd rather be rich than stupid.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
I guess we were all guilty, in a way. We all shot him, we all skinned him, and we all got a complimentary bumper sticker that read, "I helped skin Bob."
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in some crash stuff, then, when somebody comes up, act like they just woke up and go, "What was THAT?!"
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, Mr. Brave Man, I guess I am a coward.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus Flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it would be like ambition.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadors came up to you and asked where the gold was, I don't think it would be a good idea to say, "I swallowed it. So sue me."
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
I bet the one legend that keeps recurring throughout history, in every culture, is the story of Popeye.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
I can still recall old Mister Barnslow getting out every morning and nailing a fresh load of tadpoles to the old board of his. Then he'd spin it round and round, like a wheel of fortune, and no matter where it stopped he'd yell out, "Tadpoles! Tadpoles is a winner!" We all thought he was crazy. But then we had some growing up to do.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
What is it that makes a complete stranger dive into an icy river to save a solid gold baby? Maybe we'll never know.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
We tend to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. But we can't scoff at them personally, to their faces, and this is what annoys me.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free. To make someone run out with potato salad in his hand, pretending he's throwing up, is not what I call hospitality.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started, and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
|
Probably the earliest flyswatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.
Comments
|
Category:
Miscellaneous
|
Like this joke? Leave your comment
here
|
