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You might be a redneck if...
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Jokes
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There are more than five McDonald's bags currently on the floorboard of your car.
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Momma taught you how to flip a cigarette.
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There is a wasp nest in your living room.
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The Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.
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You give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.
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There has ever been crime-scene tape on your front door.
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You burn your front yard rather than mow it.
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You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
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Fewer than half of your cars run.
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You've ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.
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The taillight covers of your car are made of tape.
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Your car has never had a full tank of gas.
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Any of your kids were conceived in a car wash.
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Your momma has ever been involved in a cuss fight with the principal.
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You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.
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You've ever bathed with flea and tick soap.
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Your good deed for the month was hiding your brother for a few days.
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Your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.
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You stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
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Your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.
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