H L Mencken [1]

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The harsh, useful things of the world, from pulling teeth to digging potatoes, are best done by men who are as starkly sober as so many convicts in the death-house, but the lovely and useless things, the charming and exhilarating things, are best done by men with, as the phrase is, a few sheets in the wind.
Category: Alcohol Author: H L Mencken

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No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.
Category: America Author: H L Mencken

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And what is a good citizen? Simply one who never says, does or thinks anything that is unusual. Schools are maintained in order to bring this uniformity up to the highest possible point. A school is a hopper into which children are heaved while they are still young and tender; therein they are pressed into certain standard shapes and covered from head to heels with official rubber-stamps.



Category: Conformity Author: H L Mencken

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When I die I shall be content to vanish into nothingness.... No show, however good, could conceivably be good forever.... I do not believe in immortality, and have no desire for it.
Category: Death Author: H L Mencken

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Anyhow, the hole in the doughnut is at least digestible.


Category: Food Author: H L Mencken

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Most people want security in this world, not liberty.
Category: Freedom Author: H L Mencken

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If I had my way, any man guilty of golf would be barred from any public office in the United States and the families of the breed would be shipped off to the white slave corrals of Argentina.
Category: Golf Author: H L Mencken

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Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage.
Category: Government Author: H L Mencken

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In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for; as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican.
Category: Gratitude Author: H L Mencken

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Legend: A lie that has attained the dignity of age.
Category: History Author: H L Mencken

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Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them.
Category: Humorous Quotations Author: H L Mencken

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Injustice is relatively easy to bear; it is justice that hurts.
Category: Justice Author: H L Mencken

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If, after I depart this vale, you ever remember me and have thought to please my ghost, forgive some sinner and wink your eye at some homely girl.
Category: Kindness Author: H L Mencken

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We are here and now. Further than that, all knowledge is moonshine.
Category: Knowledge Author: H L Mencken

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The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore. It is not so much a war as an endless standing in line.
Category: Life Author: H L Mencken

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Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband a month before she marries him and what she thinks of him a year afterward, and you will have the truth about him.
Category: Marriage Author: H L Mencken Source: A Book of Burlesques

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Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.
Category: Marriage Author: H L Mencken

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A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.

Category: Marriage Author: H L Mencken

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Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.
Category: Marriage Author: H L Mencken

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The way to hold a husband is to keep him a little jealous; the way to lose him is to keep him a little more jealous.
Category: Marriage Author: H L Mencken

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H L Mencken [1]
 
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