Q: Do you like me?
A: Well, as boys go your OK, and the further you go the better!


Q: Where are you off to?
A: The doctors, I don't like the look of my husband.


Q: Can I come with you?
A: I can't stand the sight of mine!


Q: Could you be happy with a boy like me?
A: Maybe, If you weren't around too often!


Q: What would it take to get you to kiss me?
A: An anaesthetic!


Q: What happened to that couple who met in a revolving door?
A: They're still going round together!


Q: Why do they call her an after dinner speaker?
A: Because every time she speaks to a man she's after a dinner!


Q: Did he really marry her because of her grandfathers fortune?
A: He denies it. He says he would have married her no matter who had left her a fortune!


Q: Why do you want to be buried at sea?
A: To stop my wife dancing on my grave!


Q: What do cannibals do at a wedding?
A: Toast the bride and groom!


Q: Why aren't you going to marry David after all?
Well he said he'd die if I didn't, so thought I'd wait and see!


Q: I'll cook you dinner, what would you like?
A: A life insurance policy!


Q: What's the wife of a hippy called?
A: Mississippi


Q: Which group of men on TV wear pastel coloured clothes and can't speak properly.
A: The telehubbies!


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